so i’ve said it before what the situation is. David doesnt want to me with me but at the same time he does. He’s confusing me. He flirts with me. And it’s fun. it makes me feel special. But at the same time, I wish he would give me the time of day to speak to my like a boyfriend would. I feel like he knows that he has me and that im always gonna be there for him. But lets be real, i can’t do this all the time. I need stability in my life. I need someone that cares about me the exact way i care about them. David doesn’t give me what I need.

I can’t be fooling with someone like that. he isnt even that great of a friend. I wish i could be that number 1 person for him. but im not. is it time for me to move on?

I just wish i could see into the future to see if what im doing is even worth it or if i should just move on. 

I miss my boyfriend

Today is November first.
I am currently in my dorm.
It’s like 12:30 am or something but there’s stuff on my mind that I need to take out.
Today is a year and 11 months.
23 months.
I can’t tell him how I feel. I vowed not to.
He chose to break up with me. He didn’t want that responsibility of a boyfriend.
I don’t want to cry. I don’t want to feel bad. But it hurts.
I wonder if he’s gonna say anything today.
I miss him.

Damn, if I could, id be having the greatest sex with him. The way we toss and turn, the intensity. I just love it. I love how one kiss and start this whole thing. Just one simple kiss can mean the beginning of simple pleasures. And the great thing about it is that we don’t need to use anything else to help our drive keep going. We use ourselves and our bodies to stay on that track. I love how he kisses my neck, how it feels when he touches my whole body. I love it when he fingers me. I love him sucking on my nipples. I love it when it bites them and plays around with them. I love feeling his dick in my hands. Licking, sucking it. I love deep throat ing it. I love just getting crazy with him. Oh if I could have sex with him, I definitely would.

Ugh,
Just give the dogs away. They are so flippin annoying!!!!! And nobody wants to take care of them so just give them away! 😒
Stop coming up with these lame ass excuses about why you can’t take care of it.
And stop messing up my room. Gosh you dirty prick

Last night I joined the one direction family!!!

Sometimes I wish I can have a place all to myself. I don’t want to share my room with my cousin. I don’t want to share a house with my family. I want to have my own place and space. Livin on my own.

When I live on my own, I don’t have to worry to be quiet or to clean up after someone. I don’t want to be a burden to anyone. I want my own space. I want my own room again.

So today Ive been trying to take my mind of his stupid self. I’m so annoyed about how he left school just cuz he didn’t want to go. Like what the heck. It’s only 2 weeks and STILL you cant complete it. You piss me off so much! And yet I still like you. I hate apologizing for stating my opinion about you and being mad. Yeah I know you didn’t do anything but still what the heck. I always choose the wrong guys -.-